Weighty Issues

I had struggled with my weight my entire life. Even during secondary school, to junior college to work. I have never been on the lean side and our processed food diet does not help.

The worst was probably in the 2007-2009 period where work became overwhelming and I ballooned to some over 60kg monster, unknowingly. The oversized polo t-shirts and jeans does not seem to be that tight after all. It was only at my current company that I found work-life balance and also the bout of depression I suffered in 2009-2010 when bb left me.

I guess it’s always related to her that drove me to such extreme measures. I just set an impossible target of 45kg for myself. I am tracking my weight daily and keeping watch on stuff that I put into my mouth. I am seeing results and I felt a lot healthier.

I skipped breakfast. I eat 3/4 portions at lunch. I made salads for dinner. I limited my snacking. I can always feel hunger pangs.

1 March 2014 – 58.5kg
31 March 2014 – 57.8kg
1 May 2014 – 55.8kg
Today- 54kg ( it was 53++ since last thursday).

The intensity of exercise and restricted food intake only started from mid April after the holidays. The exercises include jogging, swimming, cycling, gym workout and dance / any other random activities with my work folks.

What others’ think:
1. My sister said to me, ‘life is not defined by the scale’ today when she saw me constantly weighing myself.
2. My colleague said to me, ‘why did you tell the world that you are on a diet?’
3. Another colleague said, ‘that sliced pork jerky is 12,000 calories?’
4. Another colleague got exasperated when I rejected an offer of iced milo citing its sugar content.
5. Another colleague failed to persuade me to get ice cream from mickey dees on monday.

I am not sure if I can really hit the target of 45kg, which actually would be quite scary and I would need a lot of new clothes and probably will not be able to sustain. But I would say, I can just try. The most, I could is to fall a little short, in the region of 48kg, I might be contented. Wanna feel good and pretty about myself. Loving me, every single day.

Thoughts of bb still permeate my mind on a daily basis. I am still wondering why she could be so cruel to me. Shalt keep pinning those inspirational stuff on pinterest.

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